Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Letters to Detroit (1)

Dear Detroit,

It's not you it's me. But no really, it's really you. All your pointless traffic for no discernible reason that I can see. It's like LA, but worse because we're in Detroit. You know, the city that is dying before our very eyes... Seriously, it's not like anybody out here has a job. So why does it take 45 minutes to go 11 miles? It's one of the mysteries of the modern universe. I have to say I'm really disappointed in you. Also, Woodward, you're fired! Seriously, go to hell. You're supposed to make traveling to the belly of hell faster, but you suck at life. You have 4 lanes going in either direction, but the speed limit is 45mph, and the timing of the lights is all cattywampus and ill timed. Also, the roads in Detroit as terrible! I'd rather ride in a 1948 jalopy down a dirt road at speed than be in a brand new fully equipped Chevy Malibu, (complete with leather reclining seats,) going down the Stephenson highway.

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